you would pick up someone in the library
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
You're a waste of cheezeits
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
