i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
