yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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