What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize
