we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
that is very illegal...i love you.
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