Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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