i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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