I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
