Dual....:-)
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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