last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
