next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
