You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
