office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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