So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
