I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He passed out mid-signature
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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