I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
