somebody snuck up and got me drunk
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
