I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
