Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
