Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
