Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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