you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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