No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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