He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
