Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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