make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
