ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
