You don't have asthma, your pregnant
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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