no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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