Texts From Last Night · davemanthreeve's Favorites

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davemanthreeve's Favorites Texts:

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(516): View more from New York

I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss

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(972): View more from Texas

they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!

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(843): View more from South Carolina

This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.

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(650): View more from California

dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning

(805): View more from California

1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"

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(914): View more from New York

This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.

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(925): View more from California

I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.

(916): View more from California

You're drunk. Make complete sentences.

(925): View more from California

It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.

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(219): View more from Indiana

Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.

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