Texts From Last Night · ridiculoushahax's Favorites

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ridiculoushahax's Favorites Texts:

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(970): View more from Colorado

Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.

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(770): View more from Georgia

You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.

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