Texts From Last Night · virvir's Favorites

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virvir's Favorites Texts:

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(816): View more from Missouri

That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again

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(607): View more from New York

Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles

Fav 16 5644 1259
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(505): View more from New Mexico

She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.

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(510): View more from California

Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay

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(913): View more from Kansas

the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night

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(618): View more from Illinois

When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.

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(620): View more from Kansas

I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.

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(708): View more from Illinois

youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer

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