Last Night in Michigan (810)

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  I can only date guys with blackberrys

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.

  (810): View more from Michigan

  family traditions my good sir

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  is that what this stuff is?

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.

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