I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
