she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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