he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
