My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
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