Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
she told me i tasted like america
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
