If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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