Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
