why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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