Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
