You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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