do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Randomize
