A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
