i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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