Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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