your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
