Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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