o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
My feet surprised me
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
